Road trip time again! Now I’m sorry to any of you out there that thought that that explanation mark signified something exciting. Because, unlike your regular, run of the mill exclamation mark, it does not. In fact, what it signifies is sarcasm. Intense sarcasm. This is a road trip to Woop Woop, in which we will be helping my grandmother with her spring cleaning. Please. Kill me.
I always thought that ‘spring cleaning’ was a phrase used by housebound students and mothers alike, not an annual tradition of turning out the old to bring in the new. However, it appears I was gravely wrong, as spring cleaning is precisely about that. So now Hayles, mum, dad, and me are on our way to Grandma’s house, bringing a basket full of sweets to complete the cliche. According to mum, this day of wonders has everything from washing the sheets to upholstery cleaning. Doesn’t that sound delightful?
I’ve heard that to whistle while you work you can cheerfully tidy up the place, but my tone deaf whistle would be enough to make even the most encouraging family members cringe. Alas, you can be sure I’ll be asking for the wifi password (Grandma set one up last year), putting Spotify on, and plugging those headphones in.
The thing is, I don’t see why we need to do all of this ourselves. There are places where you can hire people to do the mattress cleaning in Melbourne, why can’t someone just pay someone else to do this? In all honesty, I would be happy putting in 50 bucks to outsource this unenviable task to another poor soul. They say outsourcing is the way of the future, after all. And you know that all I really want to be doing this afternoon is binge-watching some season of long forgotten television buried in the recesses of the internet. Alas, that will have to wait until tomorrow.