I’ve been looking for some decent, unsullied woodlands for SO long. Now, I finally land upon some of it going for a killer price, just because some kid doesn’t want most of his inheritance! Jackpot. See, most people aren’t keen on woodlands, and that’s understandable. There’s not much you can do with them, especially when the trees are densely packed and it’s going to cost you millions to get rid of all of them. At least, millions without the aid of a convenient forest fire, and then you have to deal with all the ashes. I’ve already talked to every Caulfield tree removal place, and I’m formulating my plan. I want to take this woodland and turn it into a theme park, of sorts.
People just love greenery, especially in this day and age. Convince them that they’re going to be having fun outdoors, there’s going to be a place where they can drop the kids and they’re helping the environment, and it’ll be quite the money spinner. Of course, it’s all true; I’ll only have to have the tree lopping done on a few of the clearings to make them a bit clearer. That’s where the attractions will be. I want tree-themed cafes, tree-themed rides and a general tree theme to absolutely everything. This has never been done before- a theme park in a forest! I’ll be rich AND my conscience will be clear, since I’m helping people appreciate nature.
There’s so much to think about. I have to call the arborists to do their tree lopping thing, that’s a priority. And then market research, because I need my park to have everything a regular theme park has. That means mascots, rides, stalls, food, live shows…there’s definitely enough woodland to make it happen. Now, if you’ll excuse me…I have to ring around Melbourne’s tree pruning professionals, see if I can get my park running before Christmas. The holidays will do, really.
-Tyson